RENT in 30 Minutes
by I'll Cover Angel and Collins
Summary: My Version of RENT in 30 minutes R


Disclaimer: I own Nothing

Mark: Hi I'm mark! I like filming stuff...Oh did I mention I'm not paying the Rent?

Roger: I I'm Roger I'm Marks Roomate/Friend and I have AIDS and I'm gonna write one great song someday...Oh Yeah Fuck the Rent!

Mark: Lets sing!

Roger: Okay!

Collin's: I'm back in town gimmie the Key you idiots I still dont know why I dont have my own key!

Mark: Here! -Throws key-

Collin's: Shit I'm getting beat up!...Running off to the Alley!

People: -Singing- were not gonna pay! Cause were not main characters and nobody cares about us!

Benny: Stop Maureens protest!

Mark: I dont like Maureen anymore she dumped me and is now dating a woman named Joanne

Benny: How sad

Roger: Yes it is but were still not paying! RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT

-In the Alley Of Love and Hope-

Angel: Hi your very sexy! I'm Angel and I'm gonna take you back to my house and keep you.

Collin's: I think your hot and I wanna go with you but I have AIDS and I just got beat up!

Angel: NO WAY! I got AIDS too! DESTINY BABY!

Collin's: that changes everything lets go then!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -Back in the freezing loft of Depression-

Mark: I'm gonna finally go look for Collin's

Roger: I'll be here...Like always

Mark: Get outta the house! and take your AZT homie!

Roger: Whatever

Mark: -Leaves-

Roger: -Sings- I'm writing one great song before I die! Cause I now have AIDS and its all my Dead Girlfriend April's fault because if she never came to my concert then I would never have seen her and I might make it to be 40 but oh well I was a junkie anyway so It wouldent really matter either way I wouldent have lived that long anyways! but this song has a happy ending I quit Drugs cause April killed herself...YAY ROGER!

Door: -Knocks-

Roger: Mark if that's you get lost!

Mimi: I think your cute!...Here light this!

Roger: I know you your...Some Girl and I think I saw you before

Mimi: Shit I dropped my stash!

Roger: Get out Druggie girl! I quit!

Mimi: They say that I have the best ass below 14th street is it true?

Roger: Well your no April...But your ass is up there I give you 6/10 but seriously LEAVE!

Mimi: No I saw you pick up my smack and I know you want it for youself!

Roger: Nuh-Uh...

Mimi: Hey Wanna Dance?

Roger: Not with you!

Mimi: My Father?

Roger: Ew No I'm Roger

Mimi: Yeah I'm Mimi and I just took my stash back from your pocket! Bye!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -The next morning in the loft-

Collin's: Hey Assholes thanks for looking for me! Anyways I'm back

Mark: I knew I forgot to do something...Oops

Roger: Hey is that alcohol I smell?

Collin's: Yes

Mark: Is it for us?

Collin's: Yes and No I dident buy it sit your white asses down so I cant tell you who did

Roger and Mark: Okay!

Collin's: This is My Girlfriend Angel! She's a Drag Queen and she has Money for you!

Angel: -Singing- Today for you Tomorrow for me! I killed a Dog and I got alot of money! so Now I'm giving you lazy Bums this cash so I can make my new man who is GREAT in bed very happy! We met in an Alley and I took him home and Claimed him as my own! Thanks Mark for being easily distracted if it wasent for you I never would have met Collin's!

Everyone: YAY!

Maureen: -on the phone- Mark Get over here I hired my new girlfriend to work for me and she cant do it right!

Mark: Whatever I'll do it cause I wanna be your bitch again!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -At the protest space-

Joanne: Your Mark?

Mark: Yeah...Joanne?

Joanne: Yeah...I hate you Mark

Mark: We'll want me to help you anyways?

Joanne: No

Mark: Ok Then Bye

Joanne: Wait! I hired an engineer but he's 3 hours late

Mark: Bitch its Christmas did you really think he would show?

Joanne: Not really

Mark: Ok then Lets sing about Maureen and her Cheating ways!

Joanne: Sounds like a plan! I can tango!

Mark: Me too!

Joanne: Now I feel like shit your not such a terrible person!

Mark: Well I feel better bye...Pookie

Joanne: Shut up!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -At Life support-

Everyone -Singing- LALALALALALALALA ONLY US LALALALALA ONLY THIS!

Mark: Excuse me can I film some of this so everyone will know you have AIDS?

Paul: Who are you?

Mark: I'm Mark and I dont have AIDS lucky me! I'm here with Collin's and Angel!

Collin's and Angel: We dont know him we swear!

Paul: Thats alright mark you can sing too!

Mark: YAY!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -At the strip club known as the Catscratch-

Mimi: -Singing- I have this whole scene to myself! YAY! without anyone to ruin it! This is my scene and I'm just gonna strip! and I think I'm in love with Roger! and I dont care if he's a hermit I wanna do him! so I think I'm gonna go climb into his window and beg him to take me OOOOUUUTTTTTTT TOOONNIIIIGGGHHHTTT! HELL YEAH!

Mimi: -Still Singing- This is my second verse to the song! and Now I'm outside! taking my plan into action! I want him so bad! I just hope he doesent call the cops! or worse the landlord! Its bad enough I'm getting evicted that will only get me evited QUICKER! alright now I'm in my house and climbing through MY window and now I'm going into his!...Take me! NOW

Roger: NO! what part of No dont you get?

Mimi: Theres only us! Only tonight!

Roger: Leave me Alone! I wont take you Out Tonight! Cause your a bad stripper girl who does drugs!

Mimi: No day But Today!

Roger: Get out here I'll ever be nice and escort you to the door!

Mimi: Fine I'll go outside

Roger: I'll watch you leave from a safe distance to make sure you dont get Raped...

Mimi: See you do care!

Roger: Yeah cause If you die the cops will question ME poor innocent Roger!

Mimi: Angel!

Angel: Mimi!

Roger: You two know each other?

Mimi: Yeah she's like my BFF

Angel: Help Mimi out guys! Lets sing!

Collin's and Mark and Angel: -Singing- No day But Today!

Roger: Yeah I'm going inside now I hope you all brought keys cause I aint letting any of you in HAHAHA!

Mark: Shit...I forgot the key

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT

-Back at Life support-

Everyone: -Singing- Will I lose My dignity? This song is so short! so we'll just sing the same line over and over until Rpger gets here!

Roger: -Sings- YAY! I'M HERE AND I'M NOT A HERMIT ANYMORE! K NOW CAN I STOP SINGING?

Collin's: Yes! Now lets go to Santa fe! cause I'm sick of Grading Papers!

Angel: Papers? Your a Teacher?

Collin's: Yup

Angel: Thats hot! We can do some really kinky Roleplay now

Roger: To much Info!

Angel: Then Go away! So then I can make Collin's a deal he cant refuse!

Mark and Roger: K Bye!

Collin's: So whats the deal sweetie Pie?

Angel: Live in my house and I'll be your shelter just pay me back with one thousand kisses!

Collin's: Works for me! Lets seal the deal with a kiss!

Collin's and Angel: -Kiss-

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -Protest time!-

Roger: Sorry for being a hermit wanna come dance on tables with me and my Friends?

Mimi: Sure!

Maureen: Time for my Protest! MOOOOOOOOOOOO WITH ME!

Everyone: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

-Big Riot Big Riot-

Waiter: You guys suck and never pay! You cant eat here!

Angel: I killed a Dog I have Money! So were gonna eat!

Benny: Sorry about what happened Maureen...NOT

Maureen: I hate you!

Roger: Why did Muffy Miss the show?

Benny: Dead doggy

Angel: Oh shit...

Everyone: -Singing- SEX DRUGS GAY LESBIAN BISEXUAL...OH YEAH CROSSDRESSERS TOO! WINE AND BEER! LA VIE BOHEM!

Mimi: You have AIDS?

Roger: Yeah

Mimi: Me too! OMG!

Roger: Lets keep saying I should tell you again and Again!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -Oh shit now its new years!-

Mark: Benny padlocked the door

Maureen: Give into buzzline!

Mark: Never!

Joanne: I'll be your lawyer!

Maureen: I'll go too!

Joanne: I can see you flirting with a woman outside!

Maureen: What are the windows made of glass?

Joanne: DUH! thats how I saw you!

Mark: Yay! I got the job

Joanne: I want Commitment!

Maureen: Fine lets get Married!

Joanne: OMG! I LOVE YOU MAUREEN! RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT -The engagement party-

Joanne: Your flirting again!

Maureen: Cause I'm hot! But I'm always in your bed!

Joanne: lets break up!

Maureen: Fine I'll go back to pimpin Mark!

Roger: Do it! Go back to her!

Collin's: Yeah man DO IT

Angel: PURE PRESSURE MARKY DONT DO IT!!!!!!

Mark: I'm right next to you Angel theres no need to have 6 exclamation points after saying that! and NO I wont go back to her! RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT

-Back at the loft-

Benny: Mimi and I had sex so I'm letting you live here rent free!

Roger: GRRRRRRRRR We should Break up

Mimi: No! He meant nothing!

Roger and Mimi: -Singing- Without you alot of stuff happens but I die!

Mimi: I'm gonna quit Drugs!

Roger: Thats never gonna happen! I saw you in the alley buying smack!

Angel: Hey Guys Guess what! While your singing I'm dying of AIDS and going to the hospital!

Collin's: I better plan a funeral because by the Time Mimi and Roger finish Angel will be dead

Angel: Hey I can hear you Collin's!

Collin's: Dont matter once you die I get your apartment anyways! and I dont have to live with Roger and Mark! YAY!

Roger: K songs done!

Angel: Alright BYE! I'm dead now!

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT

Collin's: FUNERAL TIME! I'm gonna sing I'll cover you again

Joanne: Allow me to join you even though I wasent there when you and Angel sang it and I never heard this song before I'm gonna sing with you I hope you dont find that creepy

Mimi: Hey now were outside...I heard you sold your guitar and bought a car

Roger: Yeah You can see it from here I'm not a good driver and I hot a Tombstone anyways is it true your sleeping with Benny every Monday and Thurday and Saturday?

Mimi: Yeah and Sometimes even Sunday

Benny: Hey its none of his Business! I thought you said you were never gonna talk to him again

Maureen: She can talk to whoever she wants asshole!

Mark: CALM DOWN!

Joanne: Why do you love Drama so Much? This doesent even concern you!

Maureen: I wasent talking to you!

Collin's: SHUT UP! I can hear you all the way from Angel's grave and thats all the way down that hill you guys suck lately good luck at whatever your doing.

RENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENTRENT

-This is the last scene-

Mark: Roger cant hear!

Roger: Mark cant see!

Mark: But I can Hear! Cause I hear Angel

Roger: and I can see cause I see Mimi! but its hot out here in Santa fe so I may be seeing things!

Mark: Yeah Alexi Darling I quit Buzzline I'm gonna make a Movie about Angel

Roger: I'm coming back to see Mimi cause No day but Today!

Mimi: While you were gone I went missing and Maureen and Joanne got back together and found me in a park

Collin's: She's dying

Roger: Let me sing and scream loudly in to your ears

Mimi: I hope I die soon so I dont have to hear you!

Roger: No such luck babe! I SHOULD TELL YOU I SHOULD TELL YOU!!!!!

Mimi: -Dies then Comes back to life-

Mark: Alright now that she's ok My movie! Lets watch it because its about Angel and some clips may make me seem like a stalker because I wasent even there when she sang I'll cover you and yet I have a clip of it!

Collin's: Thanks man! Make me a copy!

Everyone: -Singing- Remember the good times NO DAY BUT TODAY! 


End file.
